Against Destiny
by loremistress
Summary: "Seiya...I'm sorry." "For what?" he replied coldly. Her eyes widened at the anger in his voice. " For what Serena?" he continued,"For loving someone else or for calling me back here to drag out these feelings and the process of rejecting me?!"


Against Destiny  
  
Author's Note: Hey, this is my first fanfic. I'm a huge Seiya/Usagi fan and after reading about a million fanfics I thought I'd try writing one. I'm not sure about Serena's last name in the American episodes so I used the Japanese name, well at least I think it's the Japanese name. Anyway I've never seen the actual Starlights season so excuse me if some of the information is a bit off. This is my first fic so I'd love to get some feedback. Please R&R. Hell, you can even flame me if you want. Anyway enjoy the fic.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own Phil Collin's song "Against the Odds" and I don't own Sailor Moon or any of its characters.....except for Yaten!!! *runs for the door*  
  
Yaten: * pops out of nowhere, grabs Loremistress and drags her back*  
  
LM: hehehe. How's it going Yaten? * blinks innocently *  
  
Yaten: *glares *  
  
LM: * grumbles* ok I don't own Yaten either. Never have and never will. Though if he would like to be a future muse I wouldn't mind. * winks at Yaten*  
  
Yaten: *rolls eyes and looks at readers * though the writer may be a few feathers short of a bird, the fanfic may be all right. On with the fic.  
  
Against destiny  
  
'': Thoughts  
  
"": Speaking  
  
*********  
  
Serena Tsukino stared at the stars, looking for one in particular. Today was her last night single and tomorrow was her wedding day with Darien. ' I should be with him. Why am I here? What do I expect?' She knew what she expected and her conscience and head berated her for it, but her heart couldn't ignore what she felt. She sighed and looked around the park and at the moonlit lake. The trees rustled softly as the moon shone brightly in the midnight blue skies. She closed her eyes and whispered the name of the one the one she waited for, "Seiya."  
  
'This is ridiculous. How could he know? Would he care?' She didn't know why she was doing this, but the memories of the night before he left pushed her here. She hated herself for doing this and felt like she was betraying Darien. But she couldn't let go. She forced herself to forget about him, but a year later the memories came flooding back. Now she was marrying Darien and she had to let go.  
  
She closed her eyes and relaxed, but then tensed as she heard footsteps behind her, 'Must be Darien,' she thought. She got up and turned around, " I'm coming Dar-Wahh!!" She backed up and stared into familiar dark eyes. She breathed, "Seiya!" He wore a leather jacket with black jeans and blue shirt. He looked good! He smiled but there was sadness in his eyes.  
  
"Hello Odango," he replied, his pet name for her, "Long time no see." The wind rustled his long hair, which was tied in its usual ponytail, and the moonlight caused his eyes to take on a luminous glow. Serena finally regained her senses and searched for something to say. ' What was wrong with her? She had been hoping to see him, but now she didn't know what to say.' Then she blurted out, ".Seiya I.I.Darien and I are getting married tomorrow," she confessed with guilt and some amount of sadness in her voice.  
  
She looked at him and winced. The light in his eyes seemed to have gone out and there was sadness evident in his face, but he didn't say anything. They stood there silently each drowning in their own thoughts as the air filled with tension waiting for words to be said at her revelation. A wave of guilt passed over her.' Why did she call him here? To hurt him more.No, she called him here to..to what?'  
  
He finally spoke, " Congratulations Odango." His voice was soft and filled with such sorrow and hurt. It was like a light had gone out; he'd given up on something. She felt tears that gathered in her eyes long before, threaten to fall. Her heart felt like it was breaking, just like that last night. Emotions tumbled and twirled within her, like a storm as the tears threatened to burst like a dam.  
  
Seiya looked at her, his handsome face filled with concern as he noticed her shaking shoulders and her wide, sparkling blue eyes filled with tears. He felt his own heart shattering at her pain. Not only had his presence here bought pain to him, but it was breaking her too. How he ached to comfort her, touch her, and gently wipe those tears away with whispers of reassurances. But now that was no longer his responsibility or right, he wondered if it ever was, it was now the privilege and right of the future King of Earth, Endymion.  
  
Serena turned away in hopes of composing herself and in a vain effort not to look in those beautiful, but heartbreakingly pain filled eyes. ' God how do I do this? I love Darien.don't I? We're meant to be together. It's destiny. He's always been there for me,' she tried to convince herself. But the breeze fluttered around her whispering one chant over and over in her ear and singing the name in her heart, 'Seiya'.  
  
Her eyes became deserts begging to let the rain fall, but her mind refused. Unfortunately her body betrayed her and to her utmost horror a sob escaped her throat breaking the tension. She instantly slapped a palm over her mouth in a vain attempt to muffle the sounds, but her heart cried for her pain to be heard as another sob escaped and its brothers and sisters followed as hot tears streamed down her face. Her legs, which had turned to jelly minutes ago, gave out and she fell in a sobbing heap all too aware of the figure behind her.  
  
She felt the raging storm inside her as self-control fought with crashing emotions. The wind blew her hair in her face stinging her eyes and then, as feather like and soft as a gentle breeze she was almost sure she imagined it, pale slender fingers gently wiped away her tears and tenderly tucked her rebellious golden locks behind her ear. She slowly raised her head and stared into sympathetic, beautiful dark eyes. His lips maintained a small smile, as he leaned closer and whispered softly, "Don't cry Odango It's not all that that bad. Tell me." It was a simple command spoken with such care. He knew she needed to get out the emotions and feelings locked away in the dark corners of her heart that were tearing her apart, just as much as he needed to.  
  
Serena nodded, not trusting herself to speak yet. He helped her up and led her to a huge Sakura blossom tree, it was almost in full bloom and looked like silver flowers in the moonlight. They sat in silence. Serena took a deep, wavering breath and glanced at Seiya. His face held an uncharacteristic serious look; it didn't seem to fit the cheerful, confident face she knew. But she supposed she was a little out of character herself. She began, " When I first met you I was really depressed over Darien's departure. I was confused. You seemed nice and were a distraction to the pain and loneliness I was feeling. You.you reminded me of him.at the time." She took another long and quivering breath, not really understanding where she was going, she just had to get this out in the open.  
  
Seiya smiled bitterly. He didn't have to ask who him was. It was obvious whom she was talking about. He wanted her to stop talking, but at the same time wanted-no needed to hear what she was feeling. He knew something bad was going to happen. Something was going to hurt.him.worse than before. Bu this had to get out in the open. He focused on his-no not his-she was not his Odango. She never was and never will be.  
  
Serena resumed speaking, ".I felt better when you were around because you reminded me of him, but all that changed as I got to know you. Your charm and warm heart won you a place in all of our hearts.especially mine," a blush adorned her cheeks as she added the last part. " I know after the battle with Galaxia I acted clueless to your feelings and that hurt you even though you didn't say so. I could see it in your eyes," she paused remembering the sorrow and pain of unrequited love in those eyes that haunted her ever since his departure. She continued, " And. I'm sorry. I thought that if I pretended your feelings were only those of friendship.that they weren't real, then it would all be ok. I was so afraid of betraying Darien. It was stupid. I was stupid-  
  
"Don't," Seiya interrupted. Serena shot him a puzzled look, but stopped talking. He shook his head trying to clear these emotions that arose in him when he was around her. " Just stop. Serena, nothing you feel is stupid.." He trailed off. ' God this was stupid. They just needed to say goodbye and go. Just forget about her,' his mind screamed. But his heart knew that forgetting her was impossible, almost as impossible as not falling in love with her was. But this was painful and confusing. He sighed, "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. Please continue speaking." He said this without looking at her. He knew if he did he may break down, because no matter what she said he knew, in the end, he would lose her.not that he had her before.but somewhere he always has this hope and now that hope was dying.  
  
"Seiya, I'm just so confused.I don't know what to do. My love for Darien seems like a blessing and a curse sometimes," she confessed.  
  
Seiya laughed bitterly at her announcement, " Love can be that way, Odango. One of the most painful things in the world and one of the greatest feelings."  
  
She winced inwardly, knowing that he was speaking about his love for her. 'What could she say? Did she love him? The emotions he stirred in her. Were they love? God, she hurt him so much. Why couldn't she forget about destiny, forget Sailor Moon and Queen Serenity, forget Rini.and forget Darien? Could she?' She looked deep in her heart, beyond the flooding river of emotions, but saw that no matter what part of her heart Seiya captured; she saw that forgetting wasn't the answer. She looked at Seiya. He continued to look at the trees, his eyes unfocused at something beyond there. His face was hard with his jaw clenched and eyes cold, but if you looked closer you could see they were brighter than usual.  
  
"Seiya.I am sorry," she said softly even a little timidly.  
  
" For what?" he replied coldly. Her eyes widened at the anger in his voice. His coldness hurt, but she could see he was hurting inside. " For what Serena?" he continued. "For loving someone else or for calling me back here to drag out these feelings and the process of rejecting me?!" He turned his face towards her and she gasped at what she saw. Not the tears that one would expect, but total apathy and coldness. The usually warm, almond orbs were empty and ice cold, freezing her to the spot and freezing her heart.  
  
He stood up abruptly and turned his back on her. His step wavered though and he questioned himself, 'what was he doing. First he tells her to tell him what she's feeling and then he blows up at her. His heart and mind warred. His eyes burned and throat was dry. He knew he was being unfair, but it.it hurt! He gathered whatever strength he had left so she wouldn't see him cry. Tears were begging to fall and he didn't know how long he could hold them. He opened his mouth, masking his voice and preceded to push the one he loved away.forever. "Goodbye Odango. I wish you and Darien," he spat," a wonderful life!" He proceeded to walk away and out of her life, but not before his heart forced him to say the last words, ".Aishiteru, Serena," he whispered. The mask broke. A tear fell.  
  
  
  
  
  
How could I just let you walk away  
  
Just let you leave without a trace  
  
When I stand here taking  
  
Every breath with you  
  
You're the only one  
  
Who really knew me at all  
  
It was so soft she almost thought she imagined it. She stood up shakily, her heart cried at his confession and the pain that was evident in his voice. Though his anger surprised her and confused her she couldn't let him walk away. She had to say something. Her bleeding heart couldn't let him leave this hurt.  
  
  
  
  
  
How can you just walk away from me  
  
When all I can do is watch you leave  
  
'Cause we've shared the laughter and the pain  
  
And even shared the tears  
  
You're the only one  
  
Who really knew me at all  
  
  
  
"Seiya.wait!"  
  
He stopped. The tears have already won the battle, but he didn't turn around. 'What else could she say?' He waited. She continued shakily, "Seiya.I lo-," Then it hit him, he knew. In a flash he strode back to where she stood.  
  
Serena opened her mouth to say something. She cared for him.a lot and even though she wasn't fully sure about these emotions.she had to end his pain.somehow. "Seiya.I lo-," she was stopped as a smooth, slender finger was placed over her lips. She looked into warm, tortured dark orbs, his pale face streamed with silent tears and the once cold, empty eyes were overflowing with emotion.so much. Pain. Love. Despair. Hope. .Loss.  
  
The tears slipped from her glittering eyes staining the soft skin and brushing his finger. " Don't Odango," he whispered tenderly, "Don't say it. Not when you don't mean it the way I want you to. Please.." He tried to smile but it ended up to be a grimace and sighed, "Besides," in a tired voice, "you know as well as I do that.you can't change," his voiced cracked but he kept on going, ".the one you. love."  
  
She closed her eyes embracing his words, his love, her own emotions and her destiny. And in that moment. it was all clear. The flooding emotions. The raging storm and.her confused heart.He was right. She opened her eyes, the sapphire orbs filled with clarity and a wisdom that was a hundred years, maybe a millennium old. She glanced up, noticing that he removed his finger and was staring intently into her eyes. She nodded showing him she understood. She may care for Seiya and he may hold a part of her heart no one else ever will.but she loved Darien and nothing could change that.  
  
Seiya winced inwardly as she nodded but at the same time sighed in relief. His pain wasn't gone and it probably would take his heart a long time to heal, but he would move on. Possibly love someone else, but he knew that no one would take the place of his Odango and the love he had for her wouldn't ever disappear.  
  
  
  
  
  
So take a look at me now  
  
There's just an empty space  
  
And there's nothing left here to remind me  
  
Just the memory of your face  
  
Serena looked at his tear-covered face. The salty drops still fell. She wondered if he noticed. A familiar lump rose in her throat and as she proceeded to wipe his tears away, was surprised and a little hurt, when he batted her hand away and wiped them away himself. He looked at her.  
  
  
  
Take a look at me now  
  
'Cause there's just an empty space  
  
And you coming back to me is against all odds  
  
And that's what I've to face  
  
Seiya felt her eyes on him and saw her hand rise as that warm and generous heart of hers proceeded to wipe his tears and to give him some comfort. But he rejected it. The loss was still too great. Besides, he didn't need her comfort.he needed her happiness. And no matter how much he wished otherwise.that was with Darien. He knew it was time to leave, but his heart urged him to ask one more question.  
  
"Before I go. I.I need to know. If we met before Darien.in another place.another time, could we have been together.could you have loved me?"  
  
Serena's heart clenched at the question, but she knew the answer. She stared into his eyes, which at the moment burned holes through her, as he waited for an answer. She nodded and softly, almost wistfully replied, ".in another place.another time.yes Seiya, I could have loved you."  
  
  
  
I wish I could make you turn around  
  
  
  
Turn around and see me cry  
  
  
  
There's so much I need to say to you  
  
  
  
So many reasons why  
  
  
  
You're the only one  
  
Who really knew me at all  
  
He took a breath as if the answer to his question finally bought some semblance of peace to his tortured heart. He stepped closer, brushing the back of his hand over her face, a finger wiping away a stray tear, and leaned closer, whispering his last, somewhat familiar words to her before she truly became someone else's, "Then goodbye my Odango. And please don't cry because of my one-sided love.remember.I.will always love you."  
  
Serena didn't turn away this time as his lips settled over hers for the first and.last time. His lips were warm and gentle as they moved slowly over hers. Serena closed her eyes, allowing herself to embrace the moment, to forget the world.and to be in another time and place. She leaned closer stepping into his embrace, his warmth and running her fingers through his long, silky locks. Then, like the wind, the warmth was gone and she opened her eyes and stared at an empty space.  
  
  
  
So take a look at me now  
  
'Cause there's just an empty space  
  
And there's nothing left here to remind me  
  
Just the memory of your face  
  
She fingered her lips and shivered from the cool breeze. Her eyes burned and she stared into the night sky. She noticed a shooting star moving away and raised her hand, guiding it as it moved out of her sight. She sat staring at the beautiful sky blanketed with stars, for how long she didn't know, she sat under the Sakura tree. Then what felt like an eternity later, she stood.  
  
Take a look at me now  
  
'Cause there's just an empty space  
  
But to wait for you is  
  
All I can do  
  
And that's what I've got to face  
  
She walked out of the park, away from the Sakura tree. The emotions still remained clear, but not as confusing and overwhelming as before. She glanced back, knowing she would remember this night forever. Knowing she would remember the love.and the loss. She looked, fingering her lips again, one tear fell. The last tear. She was Serena Tsukino. She would remember, but she would not regret.  
  
  
  
Take a good look at me now  
  
'Cause I'll still be standing here  
  
And you coming back to me is against all odds  
  
That's the chance I've got to take.  
  
After all, a wise person once said.you can't change the one you love. She turned towards the horizon and smiled. It was a new day.  
  
.Take a look at me now.  
  
-END-  
  
Someone once said that the most painful feeling in the world was losing someone you love. Another person said it is loving someone who loved another. But I agree with the one that said, it is loving someone who loved someone else.and knowing that someone loved them just as much. -Unknown  
  
  
  
  
  
LM: On a lighter note *ducks at flying tomatoes from Seiya/Usagi fans* I'm sorry to those Usagi/Seiya fans who expected a happy ending. I didn't mean to make it end this way but it just happened, so please forgive me. Anyway please *gets down on knees and clasps hands together*  
  
Yaten: *glances at LM and rolls eyes* Pathetic.  
  
LM: *glares at Yaten and then turns to readers* Please review. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed the fic! Anyway, I think it's time to teach Yaten some manners*rubs hand in anticipation and chuckles evilly*  
  
Yaten: *looks at LM in horror and runs for the door*  
  
LM: Well, see ya later folks!! *cackles evilly and chases after Yaten with Minako running behind* 


End file.
